Seeking a Feeling is not Worship
“I go east, but He is not there. I go west, but I cannot find Him. I do not see Him in the north, for He is hidden. I turn to the south, but I cannot find Him. But He knows where I am going. And when He has tested me like gold in a fire, He will pronounce me innocent.” (Job 23:8-10 NLT)
Ramblings from Connor King’s dad: A few years ago when I last trained for a Marathon, some days were days where I felt good, and after training felt even better. Other days I got up when I didn’t feel like it, maybe the weather wasn’t cooperating, and still trained. But I didn’t always come home feeling better. Sometimes I felt beat. But typically I did feel a certain fulfillment or accomplishment. I knew I could have easily rolled over and gone back to bed. Actually, the rare times I did roll over, I was disappointed in myself later because I knew I had missed a chance to grow a little stronger because of my mental weakness. And because of it, I was no stronger for the race. When I did come home from training, a much younger Connor would meet me smiling and ask me how I did running. He had no idea how much he encouraged me, and at the same time was holding me accountable.
Several times Paul talks about those of us who are followers of Jesus, that we are running a race. He pleads with us to finish the race, and finish it strong. In my simple mind I equate it to a physical race. Like going though the motions in training, I need to stick with it in the spiritual race, even when I am not feeling it. Not to simply check a “box”, say I did it, and then go on about life, but to do it hoping that it makes me a little stronger, or at least keep me from getting weaker in the spiritual race.
Sweet Kris would get up early with me and stand on the sidelines to cheer me on in the races. (If you know how much she loves to sleep, then you know that her sacrifice is a sign of true love, especially since they were all in cold Chicago! Did I mention she doesn’t like cold?) The course was circuitous so if she moved around, I had multiple chances to see her. As I ran that 26.2 miles, I lived to see her at the next spot. Sometimes it was a mile or two of waiting. Sometimes it was 5-10 miles of waiting. She wasn’t with me through the whole race, but I knew I’d be seeing her again, and that is what motivated me the most. I did not want to disappoint her, because I knew what she was sacrificing for me!
God promises us that He is always there. Not just every 5-10 miles. I can’t always see Him, or feel Him, but He is ALWAYS there. He made us, and promises that He loves us enough to always be there! He sacrificed even more for us..with Jesus….
Behold, I go forward, but He is not there, and backward, but I do not perceive Him; on the left hand when He is working, I do not behold Him; He turns to the right hand, but I do not see Him; But He knows the way that I take; when He has tried me, I shall come out as gold. (Job 23:8-10)